2day...was a gr8 day!!! =) Whee~ i enjoyed sch 2day. fun seh...haha....

well, my clazmates n i had d opportunity 2 skip pe legally...coz we negotiated wif teacher..hehe...den, maths lecture....kesian mrs foong...she was sick n had a bad sore throat. so, we had 2 go 4 maths lecture at audi. i'm so glad i din skip lecture...i learnt a few new things 2day! yay! hehe...i luv myself...hmms...den, after dat had gp....wokae...dere were like only 6 of us....haha...den, chem n maths....did our own work...n mlep...also self-study....plus...i made a sajak on de spot! haha...my cikgu lah...she wanted 2 fill in an empty space in saujana....yea...den, nana bought 4 me waffle while i solat zuhur...soo, yea! den, abbas ajak blaja kat mcdonalds bedok..so, me n nana went dere...i did physics 2day! whee~ but i've been neglecting chem.....*sticks out tongue* diediedie...dahlah my physics pun not up 2 standard...n my abg told me he got C D D O laz yr...hmms....harap2 i can get at least dat kinda grades....haish....

okla, skarg kene study. pasal asik tak blaja aje...now mesti ape tu...ah...focus n concentrate. yea...tata!

alamak....terlepas peluang naik moto tadi...ape dah...tulah...tak angkat hp lagi...hmm...my dad tadi gi bedok library...den, ingatkan nak tumpangkan me back home from sch...n den i lmbt jwb fon...tersgtlah menyedihkan...*sobs* haha..mepek je...

hmms...2day was kinda cool...i studied but nothing went into my head. how nice. den, me n farhana decided 2 leave sch at abt 4.30pm. whee~ we went tm kejap...den singgah ntuc...hehe...den browse thru magazines lah, apelah...den i beli paddle pop rainbow ice cream!! yay! haha...

n so, now...i muz talk abt sunday!! let's c...pagi2...dah terpkase bangun...my parents ntahlah...dey say ade something ah...kiteorg nak gi camping ke ape bende...jogging...n wat not lah...den, all of us were asked 2 wear sports attire...hmm...i was like grumbling all de way lah...abt how it's so not a gd time 2 bring us out 4 a family outing n all...

den, my dad drove de family 2 changi beach...(ah~memories) so, i was like wokae...asal choose tempat ni seh...drpd wdlnds pergi changi...but ok, watevalah...den, while walking 2 choose a spot, i heard my aunty's voice saying surprise! n so, i looked up ahead n saw a banner dat sed 'ARS YOUTH AND CHILDREN DAY 2005' i was so surprised...n touched ah dat all de parents actually got 2geder 2 organise dis event 4 us n 2 tink i was actually grumbling abt it.

well, 1st up, we were divided into 2 teams, Rahman and Siti team. I'm in Siti team! yea man! Siti team rocks! hahakz..den, in our teams, we were further categorised 2 youth, children n toddler.

Abg Muhammad was de leader of Siti team. yea! we were like d enthu group ah...sikit2 cheer, sikit2 jerit...haha...fun! n de 1st thing dat we had 2 do was 2 catwalk...de guys went 1st..haha...so cool ah satu2...woo~ haha...den, i was de 1st one for galz...n i decided 2 go wif sweetnes...hehe...hmm...bile jln, tunduk bawah...action malu, smile2 act sweet...*smilez* hehe....n den, dah sampai kat tgh, i curtsied twice n twirled around...hahakz...mepek seh....but i had fun! haha...

nxt game, was wet newspaper game....my grp kalah partly coz of me lah...tak tahu splash water betul2...kesian aqilah...kene bombard ngan air brape byk kali...abg md slam power seh...fuhh...anw, i can't rmmbr de games in sequence ah...so, juz campur aduk wat i can remember ah k? hmm...dere was a game 4 de toddlers, dat one was cute lah...haha...den, ade peek-a-boo....charades, hmm...telematch, puzzle game, photo puzzle, hmm....banyak lagi lah...basically....de parents relli thought of a lot of activities 4 us...plus we had lunch too...nasi lemak!

hmmhmmhmm...den, prize-giving came...whee~ lo n behold, i got Miss Teen 2005! haha....de catwalk...intresting eh? n Abg Md. got Mr Teen 2005. yea man. coolness. i got a sash dat was sewed by aunty anis plus a trophy n a crown!! whee~ serious lawa seh..=) den, de winning team was rahman team...man..so sad...but everyone got presents so, no hard feelings..=) yea. well, wateva itis, it was definitely an action-packed, fun-filled day. oh, n i did not mention dat after evry game, all de parents wd gather n sing part of a song 2 us...so sweet rite?

after prize-giving, photo taking! yupz....hehe....fun! den, after dat....off we golah...balik rumah...yepz. kla, gtg now. nite2 evrybody!

whoa...only 6 more days 2 promos....hmms....i'm mad sia....dunno how i'm gonna survive promos....gosh...i shd definitely take my work more seriously....

nownownow, let's talk abt my wonderful wkend! haha....1st, friday...aft sch ade pertabalan...yepz... it was fun! haha...congratz 2 de jks 2005-2006 who had organised it. n congratz 4 all ur posts too! =) n my abg was so merepek lah...haha...comical seh...

hmm...den, aft pertabalan, i rushed back 2 my nenek's house. got some kenduri. yepz...=)

wokae...so, saturday...from my nenek's house, went 2 perdaus in de morning at abt 9.30 am. hmm...diyana was de latez...dtg dah nak kat kul 11 pun...haha...but we had fun doing our project man...we did pantun on hutang, insurans dan saham. hahakz...cool...fun! haha...den, kak shafa had 2 go off so left me, diyana n nadiah...kiteorg gi kedai kejap den waited 4 zuhur...aft solat, we went 2 bedok library 2 pass our time...yepz...met dzahir at d interchange 1st. hmms...lepas tu, i tried 2 study...as in do maths or do revision or sumting...in d end, i gave up on maths n tried 2 study SM. wat happened? i kinda asik tertido mase bace...blegh...so irritating...

hmms...den, de 4 of us went 2 madrasah 2geder...yepz...den, after madrasah...sum1 was so sweet 2 accompany me 2 my nenek's hse, wait 4 me while i fetched my adik, den walk wif me n my adik 2 de interchange, as well as wait 4 us 2 board 168 b4 he went off...thank u eh...=)

whee~ sunday, d ultra fun day....haix....no timelah i nak ceritekan....dah kene siap utk gi skola...=( ok...b4 i get late...better be off...i shall talk abt sunday some time..heh...tata!!!

hmms...i was supposed 2 study 4 physics SPA but i blogged instead...tsktsk...

Whee~~!!!

Wokae.....dere's seriously loadsa things 2 talk abt 2day.......soooo muchhh!!!

how do i tell evryting??? coz actually im feeling ngantuk...hehe....

hmmhmm....bsk je lah....*grinz* i'm one lazybum...sori....

Hello! *smiles* *my msn pumpkin wave emoticon* hahakz...i like dat wave..

Anyway...Thx Nana!!! 4 blanja-ing me bubble tea!!! U made my day! Whee~! haha...man, i feel like a waffle + bubble tea freak. Mcm dah addicted pulak. Almoz evryday seh belik waffle ngan bubble tea. Oh wells...=)

Oh ya, apparently on Monday, my whole claz pakat n skip PE. So, we're gonna b punished 4 wat we've done. de guysnye punishment tadi aft sch...4 us galz...it's on monday....after PE....ape seh...kene walk around de sch track 4 1 hour!!! will Mr Chew relli do dat??? =/ budden rite...i was tinking...hehe...perhaps...i can put some study notes in my pocket...use de 4 free periods i haf b4 PE 2 blaja, n while walking around de sch track, i shall recite wat ive learnt n make sure i rmmbr....cool not? haha...can work rite? harap2 begitulah ye...

hmmms....i'm wondering......am i being referred to? haix...coz if u meant me....i'm almoz heartbroken...jengjengjeng. anw, i doubt ill b breaking anytime soon. yea....my spirits r improving...i've been talking more 2 nana....datz gr8 man! an improvement! haha...im more responsive now rite nana? n i feel more calm nowadays. i'm so weirdlah...i know...skejap ok, skejap tak ok....tsktsk...*geleng kepala* teruk seh...but...on de whole, i muz kick my ass coz promo is in a wk's time n wat haf i studied???????

AMAL HAYATI!!! BUCK UP!!!!

dessim si anamaskal

i'm fine. relli i am. juz in a weird way. =)

i'm wondering...how did i change so suddenly? *puzzled look*

Wat am i trying 2 do? I've no idea. Driving ppl away from me? it kinda works...donch ya tink? gosh. i seriously tink i'm mad. oh wells...wattodo..

hmm...anw, i wonder who even rds my blog. msg yg tdk kesampaian. how idiotic...seriously wonder how ppl actually view me in sch..

laksamana, puteri sudah hilang. ade org dah kidnap. mcm mane?

hah. it tink im scary these days. i tink i'm psycho. n dun b fooled by my smile coz it may b bittersweet.

ironically, i got back my essay on laughter 2day. on how laughter is important. So, it means i need laughter in my life. Teach me how 2 laugh wen i'm feeling so black. my heart is black. can sum1 plz polish it 2 bright red once agn? Make me feel, make me smile, make me laugh, make me love, make me be myself, make me be the innocent princess lost in my own fantasy world. if u do dat...u mite get the key 2 my heart. hahakz...ya rite....like anyone wants 2 go 2 such lengths. i'm feeling absurd typing out all dis. *rolls eyes* wat was i tinking?

Anw, perhaps u ppl shd juz stop reading my blog. Seriously...it's getting boring isnt it? i'm always complaining. i'm so whiny. La di da~ leave me alone.

n so....i switched off my hp for 2 whole days...y? i've no idea y i did dat u know....

u know...i used 2 feel rotten 4 being mean...now, i kinda enjoy being mean...but u know wat? i'm not gonna ask wat's happening 2 me...coz seriously speaking, i dun care...

anw, i'm seriously sorry 4 all u ppl who has me as their frenz. i'm juz such a...i dun even know how 2 describe myself...hmm...juz horrible i guess...yea...i've been a horrible, terrible fren. who has been caring abt nothing but herself. life revolves around me, yea? aww...sorry...

perhaps, rizal's rite...i shd go c a psychologist. hah...one wk's over. i can cry. nah...i tink i'll still hold my tears...wat's de use of crying? doesn't even make things any better. makes me feel more like an idiot.

so, y izit i'm condemning myself early in de morning at abt 1.30 am? well, coz juz now my sistas were using de comp wen i relli wanted 2 write dis entry. yea, makes sense...dun worry...i've slept 4 abt 1hr plus.

btw ppl, if u guys read my blog n tink dere's sumting wrong wimme...juz dun bother abt me...i'm seriously not worth caring for...seriously...

yea, i tink i've hurt some ppl...n u know wat? de thing is..i do realise dat i've been selfish...i've been lashing out at ppl, i've been crap...BUT i dun feel like changing...so dere.

i wanna talk. but i found out dat de ppl u talk 2...well, let's juz say things dun last. so y bother 2 start aniting in de 1st place...i'm sick of things. me, sch, evryting.

i wish i can juz give up.

can i juz come 2 sch 2 take my exams? coz i hate sch rite nw.

did i juz say hate? datz amazing...coz i was de one who told evryone i luv tpjc so much dat i actually used 'i luv tpjc' as my hp wallpaper laz time...

oh wells...

basically, i dunno wat 2 say abt me anymore. i dunno wat makes me happy or wat makes me angry or wat makes me calm or wat my mood really is. i juz know dat im a nutcase. i'm mad n i'm mad n i'm mad.

now i'll shuddup n do something i dunno wat.

bye2.

oh. one more thing. i seriously advise ppl not 2 talk 2 me at dis pt of time coz i mite juz start shouting at u. u've been warned.

can i haf a boyfren datz gd in maths?

whee~! kebahagiaanku terserlah...kan? haha...

*senyuman manis buat semua*

tata!

hmm...one downside...

i still can't let go...

was tinking abt de past while walking from perdaus.....erms....yea...made up a song....yea.....haix...

y oh y oh y? y oh y oh y?

not gonna put up de song tho...=P boo 2 me....

get back my smile...n bye2!

i'm perfectly fine...c? hehe...dun worry abt me....yupz....

i luv being a puteri...*smilez*

boo~ i can't sleep. how sad...sighs...n i haf a looong day ahead of me. i'll b so tired out lah. ape seh. sleeeep lah amal. tulah....siape suruh sleep irregularly...kan...dah tak leh tido. doinkz. kla, bye2. shd try 2 do sumting more useful. boo~

i'm tired. *muka sedih* tapi i'm happy. *muka happy* haha...merepek seh....hmm...tadi i actually balik terus aft sch. whee~ hahakz...den was so engrossed in playing my hp game, i ended up at tamp int....doinkz...so, decided 2 walk abt 1st den terserempak diyana at bus stop. =) yepz....

hmmhmm...2moro presentation arab! yay! haha...oh...den still hafta do another project...dis time on ibadah n sirah...haha...k, y am i so excited?

jengjengjeng...guess wat? onli abt 16 more days 2 promos not counting hml paper 1...which is wed...am i prepared? absolutely NOT. am i mad? yes. coz i neva get dat sense of urgency. giler seh. n c wat i'm doing now? blogging n chating. wow amal...i muz not b like my abg seh...k..nvm....kla. bye. no, muz sound happier...hahakz...tata!

juz wanted 2 say sorry if i seem 2 b ignoring u dis days....anybody at all....coz yea..i dunno watsup wif me but i seem 2 b rushing around for time or at times i'm juz too tired...but wateva itis...i relli am sorry ah. n one more thing...my mood is ok....so no need 2 worry abt me, ok? yupz....me, my old me is back n here 2 stay...yea, ok...n now it's time 4 sch. bye.

I'M FRRRRRREEEEEEEAAAAAAKKKIIIIIIIIINGGGGGG PPPPPIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSEEEEDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK.....I FINISHED MY EOM TADI. N GUESS WAT HAPPENED? MY COMPUTER........MY IDIOTIC COMPUTER..............MY IDIOT, IDIOT COMPUTER HAD 2 TERMINATE THE MICROSOFT WORD PROGRAMME WEN I ALREDI FINISHED EVALUATING MY ARTICLE N I STUPIDLY 4GOT 2 SAVE IT!!!!!!!

NOW...GOTTA REDO EVRYTHING...........

ape seh.....i wanted my sleep....seems like i wun get it.....

Y DOES MY COMPUTER HAF SUMTING AGAINST ME???

*sobs* k...gotta get back 2 work. bye. grrrrrrrrtttttttttttzzzzzzzz

i can

smile!


n so....my positive thinking routine officially starts 2day. yepz. no more tears 4 me....i hope. heh. n sum1 is gonna blanje me if i managed not 2 cry 4 dis whole wk. alah....sure can lah...haha...i still dunno wat i want tho. hehe...anw, i'm supposed 2 b getting ready 4 sch rite now tau. ntah ape yg aku buat kat sini. oh...i know i know. juz telling de world dat amal hayati is back! coz she wants 2 b back! haha....merepek...but always, being able 2 merepek is a gd sign. =)

so.....

i'll get ready 4 sch now. hehe. ok. bye2! tata!

ok, n so i went 2 de doctor 2day. so, physically i'm getting better. but gosh...i'm an emotional wreck right now. my heart juz wun stop bleeding. so wat do i do abt dat huh?

n so, i cried...yea....it's so fun crying u know...i do it a lot rite? haish...dunno wat's gonna bcum of me. man...promos is onli in abt 3 wks. i'm so ded.

seriously...i'm at a loss at wattodo...but wateva itis, i'd like to thank dis few ppl who have tried their bez 2 layan my kerenah tho i can b hot n cold 2 dem--> farhana n rizal. sori eh if i talk 2 both of u ikut mood. i know i've not exactly been de moz wonderful person around. to fatin who has always been dere 2 encourage me 2 study n do work n keep me on my feet tho i din quite heed ur advice..heh...but i did do some work 2day. b proud of me k? gimme some credit lah.. kpd laksamana...terima kasih kerana membuat puteri tersenyum. thx 4 letting me b in my crazy moods weneva i chat 2 u n all...thx guys...4 being my wonderful frenz...

n not 2 4get my sis, fathin, nanti merajuk pulak takde name dier...=) thx 4 being dere...i know u're willing 2 listen 2 me n all. yupz. luv u aitez?

yay! my mum's home!

Boo~ i'm sick...=/

i relli, relli feel like crying...but i relli, relli dun want to cry. haix. wat's up wif me man...me n my fluctuating mood.

finally...my mum's gonna be back 2moro...i'm still wondering if i shd tell her all dat i'm thinking abt. haix...i seriously, seriously dono who i can talk to anymore. as i was telling fatin earlier, perhaps de problem is juz me. i make things dat may not even b a problem into big problems. yea. *sighs*

sumtimes...dere's soo many things i wd like 2 talk abt here in my blog...but den, i wd rmmbr dat dere may b some ppl reading de blog dat i dun exactly want dem 2 know how i relli, relli feel. n den...even tho i can write down my feelings...but haix...i dunno...i juz dun haf de mood. n hence, everything is kept shut in me.

it's easy for ppl 2 say dey'll b dere 4 me..but how do i tell dem de real problem wen dey themselves may b involved in de problem? i feel so confused n lost. dunno where to turn to. i relli need 2 talk it out...but to who??? perhaps i'm very choosy abt who i wanna spill my probz to..but datz quite natural rite? i mean i can't go around telling de whole world wat de heck is going on in my life...n i guess...sumtimes...i juz dun want de ppl involved 2 feel bad dat dey're actually hurting me in sum way or other...n other times, i juz feel so petty n ultra-sensitive.

u know...i'm like a BIG hypocrite...seriously can't stand myself sumtimes...n dis is seriously an honest entry...haix...n aft reading dis n u feel like u wanna tag, plz dun say dat u're dere 4 me 2 talk 2 or dun worry too much..juz dun try 2 comfort me coz i'm not in de mood for it. u mite juz add 2 de fire...i'm angry. i tink.

boo...it's almoz 12 n i'm not asleep. quite unlike me who sleeps early. hmms..i'm feeling dizzy alredi. oh wells. thrash me n my life. nite2 world.

Slamat pagi semua! angin saye baik hari ini..haha...pagi2 lagi dah ketawe bcoz of sum1's comment at my tagboard. nur amira, eh? haha....

n so....i'm up n awake dis morning...feeling all fresh! haha..yepz, gonna go sch aft dis 2 do project work...written report. yupz...=)

btw, i finally know how 2 hold a badminton racket properly...haha...mcm pathetic gitu eh? baru tahu smlm...hehe....u c, b4 dis, i dun like 2 play badminton coz i'll always end up wif a blister on my index finger. rupe2nye...salah pegang racket. sbb tu lah...yay!

my mum will b back on monday! wowee...lagi 3 hari! coming soon! =)

i can't wait 4 arab presentation later...hehehe...

n so, actually...i was supposed 2 write abt some negative things..but since i'm in a gd mood 2day, i shdn't spoil my mood...so, la di da~! tata!

i miss my mum a lot. =/ juz now, fathin called my mum, so evryone had a turn 2 speak 2 her. i was de laz 2 cum 2 de fon ah. den, wen i started 2 talk 2 her..my voice kinda quivered n i was trying 2 keep my voice steady n not cry. basically, i onli managed 2 exchange a few sentences wif my mum coz den i cried n kinda dono wattosay. haix...i luv my mama..miss my mama..4 more days.